Would you say you were high maintenance or low maintenance? Somewhere in the middle perhaps? I regard myself as fairly low maintenance, in that I don't think it takes much to keep me happy. Yes, I enter the national lottery each week and dream of what if? but I'm not really sure what I would do if I won the jackpot. My take on life is much like Mr Micawber in David Copperfield - as long as income exceeds expenditure I am happy.

But there are two things that I must admit to craving. If I get one of them then it has an exceptional effect on my well-being. If I don't have the other then it has an equally damaging effect on me.

The thing that lifts me up more than anything is the feeling of being valued. It's a simple thing but in my experience it is not always easy to come by.

Looking back on my school days, for example, I can think of very few teachers that made me feel truly valued. And those that did were the ones that enabled me to achieve the most. As part of my writing course I wrote a poem about a very special teacher. Someone no longer with us, but who lives on in my heart forever. The poem is published in the blog that precedes this one.

In contrast to Neville, I can think of lots of teachers who had a negative effect on me and damaged my confidence. Maybe I was at fault, but I think that being able to value people is a virtue that only a few people possess. I certainly don't think I have it.

That's not to say though that most of us can't do more to value people. The purpose of this blog is to mark the end of my current career. My last day at work is 3rd July and I was not sure what I wanted to do on this day. In the end I decided to buy a nice lunch for a number of friends and colleagues with whom I have associated over the past few years in my current post. Simply my way of saying thank you and letting them know that I have valued the support I have been given. I sent out the invitations this week.

What I was not expecting was the warmth and affection in many of the replies. Words like 'honoured' and 'privileged' were used. How did that make me feel? It made me feel valued and happy. It just shows you - What goes around, comes around.

The thing that causes so much distress by its absence is good health. Something I'm sure most of us take for granted when we have it, but sorely miss once it is damaged. I was reminded of this when I met with my good friend Ian this week. Ian has been in hospital twice recently. Once, for a scheduled operation and then again, to be treated for the infection that arose out of the first visit. He's on the mend now though. Get well soon mate.

My own health is very good, I am pleased to say and I was able to prove it this morning when I ran in my second 10k race, this time over the Humber Bridge and back. I thoroughly enjoyed it and came 332nd out of 456 finishers. My time was 56 minutes and 46 seconds - 15 seconds slower than my last race, 3 weeks ago. But it was a lot warmer today, so that's my excuse.

My next race is in another 3 weeks in Leeds.

Finally, I am pleased to announce that I have found the perfect travelling companion who has agreed to acompany me wherever I choose to go over the next 12 months or so. As you will see he is very photogenic and he has agreed to pose for pictures wherever we may go for publication on these pages.

Ladies and gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure to introduce my very good friend and travelling companion - Wainwright (that would have worked better if the picture had appeared here and not at the head of this blog. Oh well.)

Look forward to seeing lots more of Wainwright in the future.

Live long and prosper.

Neville

In my cast list of teachers
there are more villains than heroes.

The Reverend Neville Stevens was stern
captured and tortured by the Japs,
he appeared not to approve of Jews
I picked my way around the broken glass of him.
Troubled by the discord between
his fierce solemnity
and being school chaplain,
where was the love?

Sixth form eased his tyrant grip
grammar school was a stormy time
the rip tide of each term
casting me further away
from the shore of my parents’ experience
until we divorced, aliens
gazing across
a sea of learning.
Like Jesus at Galilee
the Reverend Neville Stevens calmed my waters
bestowing the gift
of only the greatest teachers
belief

In my thirties, at an introspective cross-road
I wrote to the Reverend Neville Stevens
offered meek thanks
an acknowledgement
he told me
of his life of privilege
how humbling it had been to
tutor not only those
blessed with ability and assurance
but those like me
those ‘gifted but uncertain’

For too short a time
we exchanged letters
daring to break
the bonds of classroom doctrine
calling him Neville
until the Japs’ slow work
was complete

His epitaph is unreadable
shattered and spread
over a multitude of hearts
and souls like mine
but through him I
know the words on my tomb
He lived, gifted but uncertain

Greenwich

A Hydrogen atom in a cell at the end of my nose was once part of an elephant's trunk.

Sophie's World - Jostein Gardner

My visit to Greenwich last Saturday was very successful. As you can see from the above photo I particularly enjoyed relaxing in the park with a good view over the National Maritime Museum and Canary Wharf.

The main purpose of my visit was to take in a couple of shows in the new planetarium that has been built upon the site of the Royal Greenwich Observatory. The shows were impressive, but not quite what I was hoping for. I was expecting one of them at least to be the traditional planetarium show that displays the stars and planets visible in the night sky. As it was I got an excellent demonstration of the images gleaned from the various robot landings on Mars and an account of the origins of our universe.

I find shows like this fascinating and they remind me how little I know about so many things. This in turn drives to find out more information in order to fill in some of the gaps in my knowledge.

Time, I think for a small test to see how much you know about the universe. Which of the following is true?

• Every breath you take contains and atom breathed out by Marilyn Monroe.
• You age faster at the top of a building than the bottom.
• Time travel is not forbidden by the laws of physics.
• A cup of coffee weighs more when it is hot than when it is cold.
• The faster you travel, the slimmer you get.

What do you think? Of course, it's a trick question - they are all true! If you want to know why they are true then you will have to do what I did, which is buy a book. In my case I bought a very concise, yet fascinating book in the Royal Observatory gift shop. The book is called Quantum Theory Cannot Hurt you by Marcus Chown. Another book that covers similar subjects and more besides is A Short History of Nearly Everything by Bill Bryson, which I reckon is the most interesting book I have ever read.

I made another impulse buy at the shop - A CD ROM entitled 'Teaching You Astronomy Skills'. I figured that if the planetarium wasn't going to show me the night sky then I'd better seek it out myself. My reason for wishing to do so is linked to yet another impulse buy I made 3 years ago when I purchased a telescope.

Astronomy is a fantastic hobby but it has a couple of drawbacks. The first is you need to know what it is your looking at, or, if you are looking for a particular object, whereabouts in the vastness of the night sky it is. The best way to do this is to have Patrick Moore or someone equally knowledgeable assisting you. Sadly Pat won't come out with me, so I'm hoping that the CD ROM will be my guide.The other downside is the night sky is at its best for viewing in winter and away from any light sources. Now I don't know about you but sitting in a pitch black field whilst freezing my nuts off it not something that I find too appealing.

But on those occasions when I have dragged myself away from my nice cosy house it has been worth it. My telescope is powerful enough to allow me to see four of Jupiter's moons and that alone has blown me away.

As you may gather, impulse buying can be a problem for me. A few glasses of wine and a quick surf around ebay is never a good idea I find. Just lately I have found myself drooling over telescopes that have a built in computer guidance system. No need for Patrick Moore, just tell the system what you want to look at and with a quick whizz of the motors the scope points straight at it. Sounds perfect to me. I think I'd better not mix drinking and surfing for a while otherwise the postie is going to get a hernia delivering my latest whimsy to the door.

Live long and prosper.

Riding the Roller-Coaster

Always expect the best and be prepared for the worst.

My pulse rate rose twice yesterday. The first time it was for 45 minutes and the second time for over 90 minutes.

The first occasion was due to my 5 mile training run. My next 10k race is on Sunday 31st May, so I have to clock up the miles this week if I am going to maintain the pace I set for myself in the Beverley 10k 2 weeks ago. The next race takes me over the Humber Bridge and back, so I am looking forward to the views, if nothing else. And this time I should get to see the race leaders, albeit they will be steaming down one side of the bridge on the homeward leg while I am still puffing my way down the outward leg on the opposite side.

I'm looking forward to the race, although I don't have the big match nerves like I did for my last race as this is my second 10k, so some of my doubts about my ability to go the distance have already been removed.

I'm not one of those who wears a heart monitor when out running, so I don't know what my heart rate rose to, but it will have been steady. It definately wasn't steady when I went to the KC stadium to see Hull City play Manchester United.

I love the drama of the last day of the Premier League, when each goal scored by three or four clubs changes the league table and ultimately determines who is relegated. In previous years I have been able to witness this drama as an independent observer. This year it was personal.

It's old news now, so I won't go over the drama. In the end both Hull City and Newcastle lost and this meant survival for the former and relegation for the latter. Cue huge celebrations and emotion at the KC. We are are staying up!

Apart from the end result of staying in the Premiership, what made the afternoon special was the atmosphere and the crowd. The Man United fans were exceptional and I got the impression that most of them were very happy for us to stay up. I hope their team wins the Champion's League on Wednesday.

Football songs have always fascinate me. For a start, who thinks them up? Then, having created the song how do you spread it among the crowd?

Of course, there are the regular songs sung at every game, but every now and again a new one crops up. One that is totally appropriate to the situation.

For weeks now crowds around the country have been taunting Alan Shearer with - 'You should have stayed on the telly....!

But at the start of yesterday's game there was a new song that really brought a smile to my face. It was to the tune of Daydream Believer by the Monkeys and I'll leave you to fill in the ruder words. It went:

Oh, Alan Shearer
What can it mean
To a sad Geordie B*****d
And a s**te football team.

By the end of the afternoon we were all joining in.

Strangely enough, I listened for the song on Match of the Day, but it didn't feature.

Hard luck Alan. Well done Hull.

Live long and prosper.

Come on you Hull

Giant's Causeway - my photo - note the lack of tourists. Just iconic polygons being lapped by the sea.


Great good is often born of one small act of kindness.


Yesterday was May 1st, the anniversary of daylight saving first being introduced in 1916, of the birth of Fats Waller in 1904 and the death of Barbara Cartland in 2000. But for me May 21st held another significance. It was my deadline for submitting my latest assignment as part of the creative writing course I am undertaking at Hull University.

The assignment was to write the first three chapters of a novel. I found it interesting because in my mind I have written the opening to a novel many times. Always looking for that killer paragraph that will want to make the reader to carry on and read the rest. This is what I decided upon:

As front doors go it’s nothing special. Even when it was fresh, the paint must have looked odd. A kind of off-red that owes its colour more to a dying and faded poppy, than to the freshness of a new bloom. I suppose the gloss must have been a job lot that the Council got cheaply somewhere. The fact that the door matches all the others in the row of houses at least diminishes its impact, if not its ugliness.

Well, I think we can be sure that I don't have a potential best-seller on my hands. Which brings me to a thought I have about any artistic endeavour - how do you know when it's finished? I could write and re-write my opening paragraph endlessly and never be happy with it. I bet if Vincent Van Gough was to see one of his paintings of sunflowers (he painted three) hanging in the National Gallery in London I bet he would feel the need to touch it up here and there.

I don't think you can ever be truely happy with an artistic creation, there will always be room for improvement. Which is why when I write anything I subscribe to the same philosophy as I do when I'm cleaning my house i.e. 'Sod it, that'll do!'

Thus it is that I have submitted a piece of work to those fine academics at Hull University (they might be reading this, so it's best to flatter them) knowing that it is less than perfect. Do I care? Not a jot. I'm just very pleased that I met the deadline and at long last my university year is over. I have that school holiday feeling as seemingly endless hot and lazy summer days are beckoning me. Well, if nothing else I should be able to spend more time on this blog and give you, my dear reader, the love and attention you deserve.

My visit to Northern Ireland was a roaring success. The weather as kinder than I thought and as far as I can remember with my Guinness damaged brain cells, I didn't feel the need to assert my masculinity and heterosexuality once. I must be improving with age.

Thanks must go to my dear friend Peter who is by far the most outgoing of the two of us and thus manages to elicit useful information from anyone within earshot. If I travel anywhere I research via the internet or the appropriate 'Rough Guide'.' Peter actually talks to people and they pass on useful local knowledge. Amazing.

As I mentioned in my last blog the main purpose of the visit was to visit the Giant's Causeway. My first sight of this geological wonder was from the cliffs that overlook it and I uttered those immortal words - 'Is that it?' From up on high it did seem to be a bit small. But once I was up close and personal it did take on a much more satisfying grandeur. I realise now that any photo I have ever seen of the Giant's Causeway does not feature tourists clambering all over it, so it is hard to get any sense of scale. So it wasn't the towering colossus I had imagined, but impressive nonetheless and the feature itself covers quite a bit of coastline, not just the iconic polygons being lapped by the sea that photographers find so alluring.

That was last weekend, but as I write this a whole new weekend stretches before me. And jolly exciting I expect it to be too. I will be getting up early in the morning to catch the first train from Hull to London, where I will be spending the day. Once at King's Cross I will be heading east towards the docklands and then Greenwich. This is such a lovely and interesting part of London that I know that I will easily pass the entire day there.

But the really exciting part of the weekend comes on Sunday afternoon, when the final matches of the season in the Premier League are played. My team is Hull City and they are teetering on the brink of relegation back to the Championship, depending how they and other teams do. To make matters worse they are playing the newly crowned Premier League Champions, Manchester United, so a crushing victory looks unlikely for Hull.

If Hull do go down then so be it. I've thoroughly enjoyed this season and seeing my club play in possibly the best football league in the world has been amazing. But it would be very nice to do it all again next year so I wonder if you could help me and Hull City out? All you need to do at 4.00pm on Sunday is chant 'Come on you Hull' for about 90 minutes (take a 15 minute break in the middle) and I'm sure that will do the trick. Remember though, that's 4.00 pm British Summer Time, because we've been messing with the clocks since 1916.

Sod it. That'll do.

Live long and prosper.

Boys' Weekend Away

The Giant's Causeway, Northern Ireland

The biggest room in the World is the room for improvement.

Japanese proverb.

On Friday I will embark on what has become known as 'The boys' weekend away.' An annual event where my good friend Peter is granted permission by his wife to share my company for a few days and enjoy eating, drinking, walking and sight seeing.

In writing the above I have to admit that I am a little bit ashamed of myself because I couldn't resist doing what I always do when Peter and I go away together - emphasising the fact that he is a married man and by inference that we are two heterosexuals and very secure in our sexuality, thank you very much. If it wasn't for the fact that I am the father of three children is plastered on the front page of this blog, then I would have undoubtedly thrown that in for good measure too.

You see, despite Peter and I both being strapping chaps, about six feet three inches tall, I am convinced that we look like a gay couple and I have this disgusting urge to tell anyone within earshot that we are not. I guarantee that within 10 minutes of Peter and I sitting down for breakfast at the B and B on Saturday morning I will have mentioned his wife and our collective five children as loudly as possible. I apologise in advance.

I think it all goes back to our first weekend away together. I had won tickets for two to Paris on Eurostar and invited Peter to accompany me. We had a very nice afternoon in Paris and decided to find somewhere to stay just off the Place de la Concorde. We found a small hotel and in my school boy French I inquired of the hotel keeper if we could have a twin room. 'Mais non!' was the answer. Deux single rooms , oui, but you are not sharing une chambre. Even in translation there seemed to be a clear inference. My manhood was challenged and paranoia set in.

Since then I have shared many a twin room with Peter and I am sure that everyone accepts us for who we are - two good friends enjoying a few days away from home. And even if they don't who cares? Well, me apparently. Sorry.

On this particular weekend we are venturing to Northern Ireland. For some time now Peter has been banging on about how much he'd like to see the Giant's Causeway, so we have decided that this will be the focal point of our trip.

As this week has worn on I have become very excited about it. Partially this is due to the fact that a plane journey is involved, so there the feel of a real holiday about the whole thing. Mainly though it is because I love Ireland so much. As the saying goes - God invented time, and then gave Ireland more of it. It's a really special place.

Of course it's not just the place, it's the people. The Guinness helps too.

I've packed my walking boots but the forecast isn't good for the weekend. I don't care. I just love being in Ireland. It's gentle, restful ways seep into my spirit. I've packed a couple of books too, just in case we have to sit in a pub, sheltering from the rain for a prolonged period.

Peter doesn't know it yet but this weekend will involve a degree of planning for next year's trip, which, if I get my way, will be our most spectacular one yet. Some time ago Peter said he had long yearned to visit New Zealand, but his wife doesn't fancy such a long haul journey. One for us when I retire maybe, he said.

That time is almost upon me (50 days left) so it's time to make the dream a reality.

Should you too be making your way along the beautiful highways and by-ways of New Zealand in early 2010 and spot two large, but slightly effeminate-looking blokes sat by a camper van whilst one of them proclaims loudly that he is the father of three children, then please stop by and say hello.

Live long and prosper.

10k

As water carves through stone, those who persevere will win.

Anon

I did it! My first 10k run.

I'm not going to prattle on about the ups and downs of the race. It was all great and if I can do it then most people can. When I started my training schedule 11 weeks ago I could run at a steady pace for maybe 10 minutes. Today I ran over 6 miles in about 56 minutes (my timing. The official time will be slower as it takes a while for the runners like me who start at the back to reach the starting line). The winner ran it in just over 31 minutes. But they're probably half my age and a third of my weight.

The best thing about it was the sense of community. There were 1300 runners and hundreds more turned out to cheers us on. I saw people I knew starting the run and who I wasn't expecting to be there. And it was great to see others that I knew lining the way. My daughter tells me she was shouting to me at the end, but I was too focussed on my final run-in to hear her I'm afraid. For me, this is what living in a small town is all about. Even the local Fire crew were running in their helmets and trousers. Well done them. Well done to everyone who took part and to those who organised it so well and closed the roads off for us. Community at its best.

During the race I heard someone say 'why on earth do we do this?' and it is a sentiment I could share as the race wore on. But as soon as it was over I knew why we do it. A sense of having achieved something. I don't mind admitting I was quite emotional as I crossed the finish line (but soon pulled myself together as no one else seemed to be).

Last year I watched my youngest son complete the race and was envious of him. This year our roles reversed and it was him wishing that he had completed the course. My next 10k is in 3 weeks but there is another 10k in the area on 9th August. This is the day before my son and I set off to Turkey for an activities holiday (one reason why I have needed to improve my fitness) and we have agreed that we will run this one together so we are both in good shape for our holiday.

My time today was better than my son's time last year, which is purely down to the amount of training I have done. I suspect that on 9th August Dad is going to be put firmly in his place. Watch this space.

Live long and prosper.

Upbeat

At the writing class I attend, the use of cliches is frowned upon. The sign of a lazy writer. But today is officially a rest day so I feel I am entitled to be lazy. So here goes - It's amazing how time flies. I say that because the events of this weekend one year ago are very clear in my mind. Well, the Sunday at least.

It was a very hot day, temperatures well into the twenties. My youngest son and I made our way to the local leisure centre to take part in two separate races. Not being very fit at the time, I took part in the 2k fun run. Despite being beaten out of sight by an 11 year old I enjoyed the experience. But I did feel somewhat inadequate compared to the real runners, including my son, who were getting ready for the gruelling 10k race. Could I ever manage that race? I doubted it.

My son put in a very commendable performance, despite the heat and a lack of any real training on his part. I was proud and envious. When both races were over, we made our way back to the car and as we did so someone spotted that I was wearing my Hull City shirt and ran up to tell me that City were 2 - nil up in the first leg of the Championship play-off against Watford.

Later that week I shed tears of joy as City finished the job at the KC Stadium and won 6 -1 on aggregate. Wembley here we come! The rest is history (whoops, lazy writing again). Seeing Dean Windass net that superb goal is something I will never forget.

What a difference a year makes (thought I'd go for the hat-trick, since we're on a footballing theme). I was back at the KC this afternoon to see City comprehensively beaten by Stoke. And although it isn't over until the morbidly obese female opera singer ceases her aria, I think the writing is on the wall and we face Championship football once more next season.

But what the hey! I've had a fantastic season, seen some of the world's best footballers and visited iconic grounds such as the Emirates and Stamford Bridge. And in 2 weeks I'll be at the KC to see the likes of Ronaldo, Rooney and Tevez put goals past us. Priceless. Since Christmas Hull City have been totally outclassed in the Premiership and have looked like a decent Championship side by comparison to their peers. And that's what they are - a decent Championship side. Which is a lot more than I could say 2 years ago when they narrowly avoided relegation from that league. Other clubs go down and bounce right back. Why not Hull City? What's best - to be beaten by fantastic teams every week or to see your side score lots of goals and win lots of games?

Of course, it is not only Hull City's fortunes that have changed in 12 months. I have changed too. There's quite a bit less of me for a start and tomorrow morning it's my turn to run with the big boys in the local 10k race.

As I've said before, God didn't build me with any form of long distance running in mind, so I'm a little bit nervous. But I've stuck religiously to the training guide provided by the local running club who organise the event and I've never missed a training run since I made my commitment to race 11 weeks ago.

I won't win. This is a race between me and the clock and if I can do it in under an hour I will be very pleased.

And if, like Hull City, I crash and burn at the last minute then at least I am glad to have had the experience and the courage to live the dream.

Live long and prosper.

Choices

The Tao does nothing, but leaves nothing undone.

Lao Tzu

When I studied A level Economics at school I was introduced to the law of diminishing marginal returns, which basically says that the more you get of something, the less of it you want. My teacher described a situation where you eat a bar of chocolate. Nice. Then you have another. Still nice. And another, and so on. Each bar is less satisfying than the last and eventually you become sick of the sight of bloody chocolate! I grasped the concept, although the idea of being able to eat endless chocolate seemed great to me and I couldn't imagine reaching a point where I
didn't want more.

When I first went to the Madhyamaka Buddhist centre 4 years ago it was a magical, life changing experience. Here was somewhere I belonged. This weekend I stayed there for the 6th time and the law of diminising marginal returns was certainly in evidence. The place is still peaceful and beautiful, the food is good and the people who run it exceptional. I had a very relaxing weekend, but somehow there wasn't quite as much magic. Or maybe 4 years on I have learned more than I think and the teachings are not as profound as they once were.

Saturday was a beautiful day. Perfect weather for early May. There were 3 teachings and meditations arranged during the day. I went to the first but instead of going to the second I wandered off to enjoy the peace and solitude of the grounds.

I had overheard someone say that there was a rather special bird nesting in the nearby woods, so I headed in that direction and was drawn to the walled garden. Suddenly, a majestic shadow appeared on the grass before me. I looked up and there, directly overhead, with outstretched wings and distinctive forked tail was a Red Kite. Wow!

I stayed in the walled garden for a while, sitting on a bench and just 'being'.

A tiny bit of me felt rebellious, like I was playing truant. As far as I could tell, no one else had skipped class.

One of the best things I have discovered as I have aged is the power of choices. The ability to realise that life usually presents us with a number of options and although difficult, picking an option that is not obvious can be delicious. All too often, it seems to me, the options are obscured by rules and fears. These may be well founded and be there to protect us, but I believe there is much joy to be had from choosing the less obvious path, as long as we have conducted a reasonable risk assessment and are willing to accept the consequences.

Choosing to do something or not to do it is straightforward. But how about our emotions, can we choose those? Take anger for example. Can we simply choose not to be angry or is it something beyond our control? The answer, and this is what I believe is the heart of Buddhism, is yes, we can control our anger. It is simply the product of our unruly mind. Control the mind and you control the anger. Easy?

Let me give an example. Last Autumn I noticed that Hull Truck (a professional theatre company) were hosting a writers' group to help people who wanted to write plays. According to the website the course would start on 5th March 2009. Watch this space for further news. Fantastic, I thought. My talents will be discovered at last and I will soon be a famous playwrite.

But as the new year came, the website never altered and invitations were not invited. I emailed Hull Truck. No reply. At the end of February I phoned Hull Truck. They took my number and promised to get back to me. Nothing. I phoned again. Still nothing.

In March Hull Truck moved premises and launched a new website. I found the relevant section, which informed me that the writer's group was now underway. Watch this space for future courses! How did that happen? I did everything I could to contact Hull Truck but somehow I missed the boat. I was angry at Hull Truck's lack of response to my inquiries. My talent remains undiscovered and my life is ruined!

Then I began to look at the situation differently. I am only 2 months away from my retirement and it has to be said I am already in a relaxed frame of mind. I have some writing to do for my university course to be handed in in 2 weeks and I haven't started it yet. Maybe I will, maybe I won't. Choices again. But the point is, had I secured a place on the playwrite course I would have placed myself under huge pressure at a time when it is least welcome. I wouldn't have produced my best work and I would have been very unhappy. What a huge blessing not to be on the course. My anger has gone.

Well, it's a bank holiday. It doesn't look too bad out there, but not as nice as it has been. Shall I make a start on that university work, or shall I take a walk to Bevereley Race Course for a bit of a flutter on this afternoon's racing? Choices.

Live long and prosper.